Adultery- 7 secrets for escaping adultery – Men
Adultery – 7 Secrets for escaping adultery -Men is a must read for every man.
Hackers in 2015 published online the client list of the adultery website, Ashley Madison and showed that over 30 million men were actively looking to commit adultery. Among the list included names of famous people, several pastors and ministry leaders. Adultery is worse than a wide fire. It is deadlier than poison. It destroys anything it touches. The families, the man and the woman, the children, the extended families, the wealth and the treasures are all destroyed by the fire of adultery. It burns from generation to generation. The question why would these large number of men be seeking to commit adultery. It is either they do not understand how destructive the sin of adultery is, or that they do not understand how to escape from it.
Chase your purpose and dreams.
No matter how high a man may rise, one-act of adultery can bring him down. Why? Adultery is deadlier than poison. It eats up the soul and body and burns the body for generations to come. As a man, the first step to escaping adultery is having your eyes on your purpose and dreams. It is purpose that drives meaning into a man’s life and keeps him from being stupid and irresponsible.
A man on a mission has no time for pigs.
A man with purpose has his eyes set on something greater and bigger than one-night stand in a hidden Conner or a secret hotel room. Purpose keeps a man awake and on track. It makes a man fight distraction and temptations that seek to destroy him. Purpose keeps a man from being stupid. Stupidity is when you see a burning fire, yet you jump into it. Only a man without purpose will jump into fire. In fact, a man without purpose is worse than a dead man, so he can jump into the fire. He will run after any woman on skirt. He will sleep on the laps of any woman because he is going nowhere.
Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals
without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished. (Proverbs 6:27-29)
Think about the handsome man called Joseph. He saw his dream as a man who stars, moon and sun will come and bow down for. That dream stuck in his mind. He was sold into slavery, in the land of Egypt, by his envious brothers. He served as a slave boy in the house of his master, Portifer, but he had a bigger problem. Portifer’s wife, a beautiful woman lusted after Joseph every day to sleep with him, because Portifer, being a soldier, was never at home. But Joseph had a purpose bigger than sleeping with Portifer’s wife. He knew that this singular act of adultery will set his dreams on fire and destroy it. Rather than enjoy adultery, he ran away, ended up in prison, but that was not end. In due time, his dream was fulfilled. Joseph later became the prime minister of Egypt.
If you know you dream, your purpose and your vision, adultery will be your poison.
Be Disciplined. Draw a life-preserving boundary
Life is a choice. This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live (Deuteronomy 30:19).
A married man who choses to commit adultery is both disillusioned, irresponsible and stupid. He sets his own house on fire.
The choice you make is yours. One important choice you must make is to draw a life boundary of character preservation around yourself. These boundaries define the limit within which no man or woman can come close or interact with you as a man. These boundaries are defined by principles that guide your life. It is principles that preserves a man’s life. A man without principles will fall for anything. He is like a Chameleon who takes the colour of anything around it. You must stand for something. If you do not stand for something, you fall for anything.
Some examples of the principles boundaries a man must make around himself are:
- I will not receive gift from any lady unless such gift is presented through my wife or in the presence of my wife.
- I will not give any lady a gift unless it is in the knowledge and agreement of my wife.
- I will not visit any a lady’s house without the company of a third person.
- I will never invite any lady to a private discussion in a secret isolated location.
- I will not keep late night or stay out of my house beyond 9pm unless for a purpose which is very well understood with my family.
These boundaries and many more the man must define is for the preservation of life.
Be open to your wife
As a man, your wife knows the shape of your bottom. She knows the scares on your back. She knows how you snore when you sleep. So, what are you hiding. Be transparent and open to your wife. As open as clean water. There should be nothing to hide. Absolutely nothing.
Being open to your wife is the key live wire to protecting yourself from strange women and ladies. This is very powerful. Your wife is your soul partner. She is your helper. A lioness that roars at the enemies of the man’s soul. Never keep secret of your private conversation with any woman from your wife. Tell her everything she said. Let her know the stupid things and the good things she said and what you said. You may think, what is your wife’s business. You may even think that it is your private life. Listen, there is nothing like private life in marriage. The day you get married, private life died. Everything about you becomes shared life with your wife. So, if you want to preserve your life from being destroyed by adultery and adulterous women, open up your heart to the heart of your wife everyday.
Guard your heart jealously
Adultery starts from the heart. Everyman must acknowledge that his heart is exposed to temptations of immorality daily. They are everywhere. Women dressing half-naked, with open tops, mini-skirts, bum-shots, tight trousers, the fake eye lashes, the coloured artificial hair, the shaved eye lids, the fake attached nails and their many antics, all are targeting the man. These things are designed deliberately to lure the man into their immoral laps pull him down and destroy him. It called the spirit of seduction.
These immoral temptations have no respect for age, experience, anointing, or calling. You must acknowledge that they are your enemies. The enemy is after your life and wants to destroy you. Do not think that you are supper man. There is no supper man anywhere on earth, when it comes to immoral temptations. As long you have blood that runs through your body, you are exposed to these temptations. If you cast your eyes and your heart towards them, you will surely fall for them.
Now then, my sons, listen to me; pay attention to what I say. Do not let your heart turn to her ways or stray into her paths. Many are the victims she has brought down; her slain are a mighty throng. Her house is a highway to the grave, leading down to the chambers of death (Proverbs 7:24-27)
So, guard your heart jealously with this sense of vulnerability. Never, allow the temptation of the half-naked ladies take hold of you. It is not the type of enemy you can fight. It is the type of enemy you must run away from Run before they come. If they come close, then flee. If they run after you, then disappear. Give them no chance to speak. Give them no space to talk.
Keep away from immoral gatherings and social function
What are doing in a club house at 1:00 am when your wife, children and parents are waiting for you at home? What are you doing at the party where naked ladies filled with intoxicating wine parade themselves, robbing their chest and bums on your loins? What are doing in a social function, where you would get drunk, lose your senses and fall into the hands of strange women? You are already a sheep among wolves. If you want to stay alive for your family and generation, stay away from immoral gathering and social functions. They are trap of death for your soul. A married man who spends his time in immoral clubs and social gathering has deliberately exposed himself to the den of immorality. As a man, it is not every invitation to a social gathering that you must honour. Check if the gathering will preserve your soul or destroy it.
Nothing like free sex. Be wise
Some ladies will deliberately surrender themselves to any man as a free sex partners, but there is nothing like free sex. It is free setup for eternal destruction. The man will eventually pay a very heavy price, sometimes with his life.
If you desire to be a Man of Valour, you must make certain decisions to ensure that you will never be like the other men in this world today. This decision must be resolute and based on principle. For Men, life is first built on principles. A man without principles will end up in the dust bin of women. It is better not to live than to live without principles.
The moment you have sex with a woman, you have shared a piece of you spirit and DNA with her forever. As a man, one non-negotiable principles you must have is not to share your body DNA with strange women. So many men are locked up in the bottom of the sea because of one night stand sexual affair with a strange woman they picked on the road. So many are frustrated from achieving anything because of a cheap girl they picked up in the street. What you must understand is that there is No free or cheap girl in the street. Most of the slay queen falling over you are agents of destruction released from the kingdom of darkness and the queen of coast to drain your destiny into their coven for riches of the dark. They are many. They are everywhere. They are enemies. The moment you share sexual intercourse with just one of them, you have stepped into the python’s mouth. Their private part is the pythons mouth. The future of your life will be riddled with stories of missed opportunities, lost favour, stagnation, confusion and poverty. It is a very dangerous life.
Keep heart-to-heart friendship with your wife
Adultery breaks a woman’s heart. A man who loves his wife, heart-to-heart, knows that breaking her wife’s heart, is breaking his own heart. Sometimes, due to work and business engagement, couples are separated for a while. For some men, this is an opportunity to explore the world of unholy relationship with strange women. However, for a man who lives in the heart of his wife, separation is no excuse for stupidity. He would love his wife more in her absence. It is this greater love that will keep the man beyond the season of separation. No other woman will matter to him.
Pray, pray, pray
I will not spend much words on this. Let me be straight with you. A prayerless man is a weak man. He is an easy meal for the spirits of immorality. This is not about church attendance or about being a pastor. It is about real personal prayers for the preservation of your soul.
The enemy is primarily after you, the man. He knows that if by any means, he can drag you into adultery, he can destroy every other thing around you. One key weapon to overcoming the enemy is prayer. When you pray, you build a wall of fire around yourself and the spirit of God orders your foot steps. The problem is that so many men are not praying. Many are busy watching games, with no prayer, while the devil is setting up traps for them. Get close to God build your prayer life, rebuke the devil and live a life free from adultery.
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