3 Most important things every man should know before marriage
No man claims to be lucky in life until he is married. Marriage is a man’s life changer, more often like a military service from start to finish. There is no time for excuses. Before you get into marriage, you must be prepared. Unfortunately, So many young men get into marriage unprepared, resulting to high rate of divorce and unending marriage crises in the society. Irrespective of your religion, ethnicity or beliefs, before a man gets into marriage, he must be prepared with very basic things.
Here are the 3 most important things every man must know before marriage.
Know your life purpose
The essence of a man’s life is revealed in his purpose. Before you to take a lady as wife, first find your purpose. What is purpose? Purpose is what a man is created to do and fulfill here on earth. Purpose sets direction for a man’s life. In fact, everything in a man’s life must begin and end with his purpose.
Myles Munroe once said, “until purpose is discovered, existence has no meaning, for purpose is the source of fulfillment.” It is purpose that set the direction for a man’s life. It is energy that drives meaning into a man’s life. Whatever a man turns out to become is framed by his purpose. A man’s purpose creates meaning and wealth for him.
God is a God of purpose
God never gives a wife to a man without first giving him a purpose. God is a God of purpose. Before God created man, he created everything in the world and Eden. Before God gave Adam a wife, Eve, Adam was already fulfilling his purpose in Eden. Purpose comes before marriage. It is time to discover your purpose.
Therefore I run thus: not with uncertainty. Thus I fight: not as one who beats the air (1 Corinthians 9:26).
Life without purpose
Life without purpose is not worth living. A life without purpose is worse than death. For this reason, God created everyman with a purpose to fulfill. Here is the tragedy! So many men are making marriage proposals and going to the altar without a clue of what their purpose in life is. Some are still guessing what their purpose could be.
The greatest tragedy in a man’s life is to get into marriage without a clear purpose of his life. Some men after marriage would turn and ask their wives, “what do we do now?” This is a tragedy. When a man takes a lady from his father’s house without a clear purpose for his life, the lady comes in confused not knowing what to do with the man. This is the beginning of most marriage crises.
A man without purpose does not know where he is going. How can someone who does not know where he is going to take another along. It is a disaster. They both will end up in the wilderness. Until a man discovers his purpose in life, he is not yet ready for marriage.
Know your position and its responsibilities
A man’s understanding of the weight of his Position in marriage is a critical success factor of his marriage. For example, when any man wants to build a house, he starts by laying a foundation. Every other structure including the walls, windows, roofing and household items will eventually sit on the foundation. The foundation must carry the entire weight without complaining. If the foundation starts complaining, it will crack, the building will eventually collapse.
When God was about to create the family, he started by creating the man first. Thus, the Man is the foundation of the family. He is the structure that carries the weight of the entire family, financial, emotional, material and spiritual.
The position of the man is the foundation. Before you jump into marriage, are you ready to take the position of its foundation and carry the weight of everything? If you are not ready, stay away from it.
Men, who do not understand this position, begin to complain shortly after marriage. The moment a small weight of marriage is placed on them, they will drop it. Within the first 3 – 6 months, they are tired and complaining. Many men run away from their families, abandoning their wives and children. Others become very angry, smashing the heads of their wives and children in violence, in reaction to the weight of marriage.
If a man becomes the wall, the roof, the window or the door in his family, then he has failed. The marriage will eventually collapse. The position of the man is at the foundation.
Being the foundation has a lot of benefit if the man is willing. It is easy to be a foundation than to be wall, because foundations are made of iron steel and hard concretes. This is why the strength of the man is different and unique. When a man is willing to carry his family, strength is released for him, by his maker, God almighty. Also, the foundation stays in the ground, where all water and mineral nutrient saturates constantly. The man who takes his position as the foundation of the family receive saturation of supply of water and nutrient constantly.
Know the Principles and their impact
Life is governed by principle. Every man of obedience and righteousness towards God. Men without principle often commit blunders in their marriage life, leading to divorce. Before a man jumps into marriage, he must make sure that he has principles. Those principles must be based on obedience to God’s word.
A man who cannot live by Godly principles should forget about marriage because marriage without principles is like ice placed on fire; it will completely melt away in a short time.
Disobedience to God brings disobedience to men. When a man lives in disobedience to God’s word, the wife will live in disobedience to him. Many marriages are broken because of the man’s disobedience towards God.
A man cannot disobey God and expect his wife to obey him. It is impossible. Life in a marriage is a reflection of life with God. It is life based on the principles of submission, patience, love and sacrifice. If I man obeys God in these principles, his wife will obey him. If a man disobeys God, his wife will disobey him the more and provoke him to anger and heart attack. If a man is not ready to obey God, he should stay away from marriage.
Marriage is a blissful journey and definitely not a walk in the park. Every man must be prepared for the journey. As part of your preparation, there are 3 most important things you should know about yourself. Here they are: You must know your life purpose. You must know your position and its weight. Finally, you must know its principles and their impact.
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